haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
