Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.

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  (303): Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !! (832): Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless. http://tfl.nu/apa0
  Replies (20) Good night (3931) Bad night (700)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!

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  (312): She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon! http://tfl.nu/58y3
  Replies (9) Good night (4128) Bad night (751)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.

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  (908): Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got. http://tfl.nu/yeqj
  Replies (12) Good night (1274) Bad night (4054)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.

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  (215): winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am. http://tfl.nu/p45r
  Replies (26) Good night (4650) Bad night (2261)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me

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  (973): i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me http://tfl.nu/lmdm
  Replies (20) Good night (6578) Bad night (1020)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.

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  (203): I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it. http://tfl.nu/2i57
  Replies (43) Good night (4189) Bad night (4513)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.

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  (609): I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad. http://tfl.nu/4fga
  Replies (11) Good night (3235) Bad night (2024)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...

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  (302): And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks... http://tfl.nu/1g5k
  Replies (13) Good night (1170) Bad night (2486)
• Favorite

  (578): View more from

  You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"

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  (578): You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide" http://tfl.nu/y8fp
  Replies (6) Good night (3006) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Was he satisfied?

  (416): View more from Toronto

  No, and very vocal about it.

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  (416): I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home (647): Was he satisfied? (416): No, and very vocal about it. http://tfl.nu/h3jb
  Replies (8) Good night (2515) Bad night (786)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.

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  (661): He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian. http://tfl.nu/6vas
  Replies (25) Good night (3479) Bad night (654)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.

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  (608): You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here. http://tfl.nu/9wgz
  Replies (9) Good night (442) Bad night (1448)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  But college guys get to crossfade so there's that

  (305): View more from Florida

  No idea what that is

  (408): View more from California

  Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...

  (305): View more from Florida

  I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words

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  (408): But college guys get to crossfade so there's that (305): No idea what that is (408): Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together... (305): I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words http://tfl.nu/rs53
  Replies (8) Good night (1399) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling

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  (217): You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling http://tfl.nu/odh7
  Replies (1) Good night (506) Bad night (196)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?

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  (208): Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess? http://tfl.nu/auqt
  Replies (6) Good night (739) Bad night (191)

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