Texts From Last Night

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  (760): View more from California

  Man, ugly runs in her family

  (619): View more from California

  yeah, big time

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  (760): Man, ugly runs in her family (619): yeah, big time http://tfl.nu/1vgn
  Replies (5) Good night (634) Bad night (1786)
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.

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  (580): I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch. http://tfl.nu/axjt
  Replies (31) Good night (6173) Bad night (1027)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.

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  (631): i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee. http://tfl.nu/3r9a
  Replies (16) Good night (5031) Bad night (747)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon

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  (304): You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon http://tfl.nu/eqby
  Replies (5) Good night (4940) Bad night (1394)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  [insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]

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  (937): [insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight] http://tfl.nu/2cq7
  Replies (29) Good night (11651) Bad night (2661)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.

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  (920): i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel. http://tfl.nu/bqxg
  Replies (26) Good night (13152) Bad night (1373)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.

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  (405): Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights. http://tfl.nu/1mso
  Replies (3) Good night (2869) Bad night (866)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja

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  (512): we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja http://tfl.nu/0h0h
  Replies (9) Good night (5231) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.

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  (707): Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life. http://tfl.nu/o39j
  Replies (6) Good night (1408) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.

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  (239): I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN. http://tfl.nu/tffx
  Replies (5) Good night (551) Bad night (1335)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.

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  (253): For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo. http://tfl.nu/ryca
  Replies (3) Good night (1205) Bad night (392)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's

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  (616): Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's http://tfl.nu/uou0
  Replies (12) Good night (911) Bad night (426)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time

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  (803): If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time http://tfl.nu/10i6
  Replies (3) Good night (1006) Bad night (352)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.

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  (860): smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells. http://tfl.nu/aysq
  Replies (4) Good night (369) Bad night (499)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras

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  (780): Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras http://tfl.nu/dst4
  Replies (0) Good night (578) Bad night (138)

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