Pappa wants mamma naked
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
