I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
