dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize