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i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
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