No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Do you still have your period?
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
