3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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