I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize