So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
My life is pants optional.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
