and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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