Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
not ubering you a puppy
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
