Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i used baking grease as lip gloss
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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