There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?