We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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