no, he came in my armpit
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
