He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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