so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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