Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
