bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
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