yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize