its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Randomize