good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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