She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Randomize
