The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
