"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize