Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
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