shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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