Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
