when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
