STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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