Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
