I never want to see another naked old woman again.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
