You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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