What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I can't turn off my feet"
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Please don't give away my fajitas
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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