She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
My balls are so social today.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
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