Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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