Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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