I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Randomize
