You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
My balls are so social today.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
