she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
