Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
