If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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