It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
