Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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