like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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