i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
My life is pants optional.
Randomize