Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
