lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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