Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
