I think scott just propositioned me for sex
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
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Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
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In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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